Always Here

The above is quite a harrowing excerpt from one of the Carers registered with Carers Support. But just what is meant by ‘caring’? According to NHS England, a Carer is anyone, including children and adults who looks after a family member, partner or friend who needs help because of their illness, frailty, disability, a mental health problem or an addiction and cannot cope without their support. The care they give is unpaid.

Research has shown that it can take over a year for someone to acknowledge they are a Carer. This can be in part due to the carer not seeing their caring role as separate from the relationship they have with their cared for. For example, a lot of Carers see it as their duty to care for their mum, or partner or sibling. So it can take a while to make that distinction.

If you are not in a caring role now, you might find yourself wondering ‘why does someone need support to take care of their husband or parents’? Which is where the phrase: ‘caring can be wonderful but tough’ comes in. Because whilst some carers may view it as a privilege, quite often, caring is not a choice but more something bestowed upon them. And as conveyed by Mandy, the effects of caring can be quite catastrophic.

Unless you are in a caring role, or have experienced it at some point, you may not understand the pressures which can build, over time. Tensions can appear in different forms. Such as financial woes, mental and physical exhaustion, the increasing need for a break from the caring role, having to leave employment to fulfil the caring role. From the outside looking in, the carer may appear to be doing their duty, but that duty, more often than not, comes at a cost.